I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize
