A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
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