know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
