That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
