weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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