can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
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