nut hugger
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
