do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
