just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
i believe in u and ur pee
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
