Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
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