Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
