I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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