It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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