Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
