did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Randomize
