my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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