come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
