If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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