Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
