I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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