Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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