Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize
