I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize