do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
