how can u be prego again
Moan for me like Helen Keller
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
