Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
