wrigley field is MILF paradise
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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