So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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