I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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