Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
