i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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