I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize