look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
