it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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