Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
