So drunk its hurt
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
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theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
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All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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