hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
