I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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