i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
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you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
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The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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