I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize