I would go down on you faster than GM stock
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
as a side note pls kill me
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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