I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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