I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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