He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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