the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
