I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize