I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
