Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
