Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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