If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize