you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
